Friday, March 19, 2010

of it never ever being enough for you

Got 3 B's for my 3 subjects in my last semester, and as expected it still isn't good enough for mom. Its on and on about scholarships and stuff. You know prashant, just go kill yourself, you just will never be good enough, go slit your wrists, hang yourself, fall in front of a moving vehicle or jump off a tall building. You Suck prashant, you always have you worthless fuck!

Monday, March 15, 2010

of junk since i last posted and some tunes...

Well its been a while since my last scribble, been kidnapped by assignments and exams,but it seems they couldn't keep me in their clutches for long.. Think i kinda messed up my nutrition in overall but did better for menu planning, but the nutrition assignments were the fuck load, spent god knows how many hours with my group mates from 9am till 8pm finishing our assignment!! Then got fucked over my my friend who said he would help me print my individual assignment near college and pass his and mine together the next day since i would be working, but....he calls me up the next day saying he doesn't want to pass his individual one up, but i wanted to, looks like i gotta rely on my group assignment for a life saving, considering the time we spent on it.

Went for a movie yesterday and the day before, thank goodness none that i called came for the Thursday movie, Under The Mountain, if you all came, sure i kena goreng from the lot, the poster cakap the special effects team from good movies, but the effects sadly lose to Star Wars 1977, and rather lame acting, the reactions on their faces when it came to fearful moments were like they were bloody trying their best not to burst out laughing at the sheer crappy effects they were seeing. The only effects that were good came at the end of the show, literally at the end, there were a bunch of fiery volcanoes, that looked shit good, but were not enough to save to show on whole. Sam Neill, just stick to 'being chased by dinosaurs' that's one spot you look great in, Always!

Been sleep deprived for the past two weeks or so, due to exams, assignments and thoughts about 'The girl'... Caught up on sleep last night, but could've used a few more hours, which i could've had if i didn't have to stop by work to get some stuff. Been hanging out with cousin often, at work and out, been jogging and football mainly, and my cousin has a girlfriend too now. :) Message to him, 'She is your girl friend dude, stop saying she isnt!!! *pinches cousins cheeks*  And don't *ahem*, please.................? Remember what i said about the both of you waiting till there are rings on both your fingers first, trust me, it is worth the wait. I know you've lost 'it' before, but don't lose it again, aite? For the the love of god and the both of you.

'The girl' has been on my mind always, like literally almost always, but i guess i mean nothing to her since she doesn't reply my messages already, which are like CNY wishes or how she is or when is her next trip back to penang is or one of those friendly messages. Lines from songs that remind me how i feel about her like....

But if I had you, that would be the only thing that I would ever need
Yeah if I had you, then money fame and fortune never could compete
.

I dreamed you now every night
in my mind is where we meet.



It would be such a shame not to give us the chance......I thought I might say to you
You put the beautiful in life.



I don't know how you do what you do
I'm so in love with you
It just keeps getting better
I wanna spend the rest of my life
With you by my side
Forever and ever

(Seems more like a song for people actually together which we are not , but still a song that gets my heart yearning)


All that I'm after is a life full of laughter
As long as I'm laughin' with you...

Without you God knows what I'd do...
Know there's no life after you.

Have you ever...
(by Brandy, e-v-e-r-y word in the song is the perfect explanation to what i'm going through)

Well I know that it's a wonderful world
From the sky down to the sea
But I can only see it when you're here, here with me.


I'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're 'bout to cry
And I know your favorite songs and you tell me 'bout your dreams
Think I know where you belong, think I know it's with me

Can't you see that I'm the one who understands you?
Been here all along, so why can't you see?
You belong with me


I might have to wait,
I’ll never give up,
I guess it's half timin', and the other half's luck,
Wherever you are,
Whenever it's right,
You'll come outta nowhere and into my life.....


Oh, I just can't get enough
How much do I need to fill me up?
It feels so good it must be love
It's everything that I've been dreamin' of
I give up, I give in, I let go, let's begin
'Cuz no matter what I do,
Oh, oh my heart is filled with you.


Now this mountain I must climb
Feels like a world upon my shoulders
I through the clouds I see love shine
It keeps me warm as life grows colder....

In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
Can't stop now, I've traveled so far
To change this lonely life....

I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me.


If only you knew, Why my heart goes through for you
I'm tryna break through, Don't you think it's worth the chance?


The way you can't cut a rug, watching you's the only drug I need
You're so gangsta, I'm so thug, you're the only one I'm dreaming of
You see, I can be myself now finally, in fact there's nothing I can't be
I want the world to see you be with me
.


Let me be the one you run to
for the rest of your life
I'd give up everything to show you
to show you there's still time
I could be the one you run to
for the rest of your life
I'm still learning how to love you
You're the only one that's worth the fight
.

I just wanna be the hand you hold when you're cryin'
I just wanna be the voice that tells you it'll be alright and
When your world is coming down and helps nowhere to be find
Well I'll be here, well I'll be here, well I'll be here
For ya..


I've been seeing Lisa now, for a little over a year
She says she's never been so happy, but Lisa lives in fear
That one day Daddy's gonna find out that she's in love
With a Nigger from the streets
Oh how he would lose it then, but she's still here with me
Cuz she believes that love will see it through
One day he'll understand
He'll see me as a person, not just a black man.


You make me smile like the sun, fall out of bed
Sing like bird, dizzy in my head
Spin like a record, crazy on a Sunday night..

You make me dance like a fool, forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Oh, you make me smile
.

Cause If one day you wake up and find your missing me
and your heart starts to wonder where on this earth I could be
Thinking maybe you'll come back here to the place that we'd meet
And you'll see me waiting for you on our corner of the street
So I'm not moving, I'm not moving
.

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
.


I can be your hero, baby
I can kiss away the pain
I will stand by you forever
You can take my breath away.


But how do you expect me
To live alone with just me?
'Cause my world revolves around you
It's so hard for me to breathe.


When I see you smile
I can face the world
Oh you know I can do anything
When I see you smile
I see a ray of light
Oh I see it shining
right through the rain
When I see you smile
Baby when I see you smile at me.


Now I know better from his fingers in your hair
I'll forgive you for what you've done
If you say that I'm the one
I've had other options too
But all I want is you.


For you I am a better man
I said you are the reason
For everything that I do
I'd be lost, so lost, without you.


If it's wrong to tell the truth
What am I supposed to do
All I want to do is speak my mind
If it's wrong to do what's right
I'm prepared to testify
If loving you with all my heart's a crime
Then I'm guilty.


Oh,  you can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for.
I can't help it,  there's nothin' I want more,
Yeah, I would fight for you,

I'd lie for you.
Walk the wire for you,

yeah, I'd die for you.


When you love a woman
you tell her that she's really wanted
When you love a woman you tell her that she's the one
she needs somebody to tell her
that you'll always be together
So tell me have you ever really -
really really ever loved a woman?


When I give my heart it will be completely
Or I'll never give my heart.


Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know..

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it really just another crush?...

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
?Cause I've tried and tried to walk away
But I know this crush ain?t going away....

Going away...
See it's a chance we've gotta take
Cause I believe that we can make this into
Something that will last, last forever, forever!


They call her love, love, love, love, love
They call her love, love, love, love, love
She is love
And she is all i need
She's all i need.

And one of these days
I'm gonna sign myself away
I'll find the courage, and I'll find the grace
And I'm gonna know just what to say
Oh, and you'll call me up
When you want this love
Or when you've had enough
And you're giving it up.....
Because I've kept my heart under control
But lately, all this time has taken it's toll
Said I tried to, but I can't hold back what's deep in my soul
Oh, so darling, please forgive me if
I want you and you'll just have to know.

She, she is the words that I can't find
How can the only thing that's killing me, make me feel so alive
And I couldn't speak
I couldn't breathe to save my life
All of my chances swim like sinking ships
This time it's it
I'll drown or make her mine.

You have stolen my
You have stolen my
You have stolen my heart............


Well those are just 'some' of the tunes that get my thoughts going about her, miss lovely..
If i were to list all them songs, sure no ruang already, my blog site would implode/explode!!!

Monday, March 8, 2010

of being just a lil too late

 

Poor ol dinosaru yang comel sekali, they missed old noah's ark cruise and they've become museum relics because of that, poor dinosaru.... and the spelling dinosaru sounds comel-er to mee......